Archive for the ‘letters’ Category

Well it’s Saturday night, and I’m at home typing this letter. How sad is that! I should be out on the Disco floor or riding a motorcycle over a cliff. I guess later the excitement will rise as we discuss carpet cleaning products (child vomits and plops on the carpet) or how I eat too […]

Dear Barbra I heard you recently landed a two4one all expenses paid package at a local government establishment, and since I am off work today I thought I would pursue a small investigation into the details of such an offer. Well I can tell you that you have nothing to worry about. Apparently Donald Pleasance, […]

Dear Clare & Paul How many times have I sat before this monitor with the intention to type! Each time I do some fatal distraction occurs, such as a “plop plop” or a “wee wee”. Some nights I just stare at the glowing screen, and wonder who I am. I thought I was Maisey yesterday […]

Dear James & Family The elves and I have been busy preparing for the Christmas fest. Since yours is a particularly large order we have scheduled it for an early, and dare I say conventional delivery via Royal Mail. As usual I am unable to provided you with a return address in case of damaged […]