Archive for October, 2009

I have been meaning to write since that traumatic night in July, when I was forced to drink far to much wine and dance to the sounds of faded crooners. I still feel dirty. The soap has no effect. Anyway I guess what I’m trying to get around to saying, and believe me it’s hard […]

It’s Monday. I feel tired. Think I’ll change my jeans tonight. Steph says that I should change them more often as they smell. This from a woman who talks about saving the planet. All the clothes glow due to the large amounts of whitener in the washing liquid. The washing machine is on 24/7. I’m […]

Dear Laura & Craig Thanks for Sunday night. I had a brilliant time. It’s been a long time since I was set free, and allowed to talk to other people. I don’t know why but I am viewed in general as being quite mad. There’s nowt funny as folk I suppose! I loved the veggie […]

Dear Mike & Sarah So you want to visit do you? Well the Moon is full and the dogs are howling so why not! If you cannot run the enclosed AutoRoute due to a lack of a personal PC then you are both sick. If this is the case I would advise you to drive […]

Dear Robert Sorry I cannot be with you today to share in the delights of washing a baby in public. If things go to plan I should be pooing myself round about now. I’m using “bleeding edge technology” which is bleeding crap to deliver a new online system, which I promised everybody I could deliver […]